The depression I sank into was caused by the eight week delay in getting my first shot of Testosterone replacement. At four weeks I was beside myself, hot flushing many times a day, quite deranged at times and with frequent temper outbursts. There was no coherence to the once logical thought processes I had come to rely on. It was extremely unnerving.
I liken it to PMS in women which I suppose gives me a rare male insight into the monthly hormone horrors a lady endures. So difficult did I find it to handle in the face of the complacent, ignorant unyielding medical world I found around me that I attempted suicide, unwilling to live a life that sent me mad half the time.
This difficult period in my recovery eased when I opted for pellet implants which stabilised me for three months at a time. I analysed myself and decided I’d been living the wrong life. I was in business, a sportsman and a hedonist to boot. It had to change.
I began my metamorphosis and stayed at home. No longer excessive, no longer a womaniser, desperate to escape the hedonistic world around me I made plans to leave my business, Twickenham and the UK, for what I didn’t know. I just knew I had to find the right headspace to write.
As I prepared to leave early in 1992 I visited my brother, who showed me the Internet.
Three years later I found myself in Dublin working with him to establish an Internet business. It was then that I decided this was the forum for me to do what I needed to do.
Early in 1996, now in Canada, I finally got the whole experience of my chest when writing www.tmoae.com and publishing it on the web. Later that year as I scoured the nascent web for other TC sites, I happened across the TCRC, tcrc.acor.org where I made sufficient nuisance of myself and became its Associate Editor.
The early email list with its global subscription of around 700 provided a model for excellent TC support and information thanks to Doug Bank. It was there that I realised male hormones were being ignored globally.
Back in the UK now in early 2003, my constant unsubstantiated harping about the importance of our hormones received a golden shot in the arm, courtesy of Dr Brandon Hayes Lattin, who sent me the newly published American guidelines for male Hypogonadism. This formed the backbone of my hormone website at www.androids.org.uk which was honoured to be included in the British Library’s first tranche of websites archived in 2005. The drive for male hormone awareness and correct treatment continues.
I worked to help Checkemlads.com develop into a respected and popular TC support group in the UK between 2003 and 2016 when I decided my retirement from work and the onset of Arthritis were telling me to slow down.
It has and continues to be a fascinating ride as I see quality Facebook groups and pages, websites offering support across the world just twenty years after it began, putting an end to the ignorance about this horrible disease.
For me, there can’t be too much good quality TC awareness and support, so to see the fantastic development around the Internet world is heart-warming indeed. If I could say the same for male hormones I’d die a very satisfied man.